Agreed. This is really uncomfortable and usually in this sort of setting I would just giggle, flip my hair, and smile...stunned stupid as to how and where this new encounter originated. If that doesn't work, then I'm left one option: RUN! Which might explain why my love life is so stunning as of late.
Right. Mine too. People are always like "Oh my gawd! You live in New York!? So, is like, 'Sex and the City' basically your life?" To which I'm all like, "Yeah it is!" and they are like, "Really!?" and then I'm like, "No."
Okay, so we bet you are wondering why this is written in two different fonts and colors. Notice how we said 'we are wondering.' If you need further explanation, we are worried, but willing to give it. We are two single gals- insert cheesy joke here- living it up in the big city. If you didn't read that last sentence sarcastically, we would like to give you the opportunity to go back and give it another shot. We'll wait.
We'd like to get to know each other a little better. Not me and Caitlin, we know each other already. Obviously. Seriously, I am starting to get a little worried with your guys' level of perception. So, we wanna let you get to know us before you decide if our lives are something you want to commit to. Consider this our first cyber date. Caitlin, you go first because I wanna eat this soup you just made.
Ummmmm......ok....So, hi! I'm Caitlin. I'm a single, twenty-something, awkward girl attempting to live in the big bad city. I'm not sure it's so bad, but it is big...but that's not really the saying is it? In attempts to hide my semi-awkward introversion, I like to pretend I'm an undefinable mix of Audrey Hepburn's class, Ava Gardner's sass (I would say sex.....but that would be a BOLD faced lie), and Kim K.'s ass. That is also a little untrue, because not only do I not have that ass, I'm not sure I have the confidence to rock something that is equivalent to the size of a small nation. So, mostly I like sundresses, lipstick, and sarcastic comments. All ass comments are probably 78% out of jealousy. Also, all percentages I use, which will be often, are based in fact....sometimes.
Back to meeee! So, by default that would make me Carly. Which is totally cool because that was my second choice! I am a single, slightly younger twenty something (suck on that Caitlin! those 9 and 1/2 months make all the difference!), looking for excuses to wear as many patterns at once as humanly possible. People seem to like me okay, mainly because I will talk at you until I hit on something you find mildly interesting and I curry your favor. I am a lovely blend of Steve Martin's dancing, Liz Lemon's eating habits and James Roday's non-sequential comments. Trust me, guys love it. Trust me, I'm the Doctor. Okay, one or two of the last comments are untrue... Basically, I live for dragons, muppets and when people rhyme on accident.
Now that we are all a little more acquainted, we would like to invite you to join us in our quest. "A quest?! What quest???" Whoa. Calm your tits. We were about to say, before you freaked out....ANYWAYS.....basically, we just want you to come along with us as we try to figure exactly what we want in life, since college degrees in the arts don't seem to prepare you for this so-called "real life." Also, you can watch us crash and burn during our mediocre attempts to have a love life. Like we said, Sex and the City....except not.
Right. Or at the very least this blog will turn into a moving tale about how two young girls met, became friends and then died alone, side by side. Really, it's going to be beautiful either way.
Alright. Lets do this shit.
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